Speaking From the Diaphragm
The Vaginal Davis Blog
. . .From the Counsel of Inter-Continental Balistic Principalities
Saturday, June 18, 2005
SARABAND
Something grand in the works. I may be editing a new magazine venture that will hopefully blow the LA Bleakly out of the water. This new project purports to be a mixture of Time Out Magazine and the olde entertainment/arts periodical from the 70s, After Dark. Now who out there remembers After Dark Magazine? If you do, you’re dating yourself. The reasoning behind creating a new magazine is simple. The LA Bleakly has been the only game in town for too long, and its time it was tumbled. Plus the Bleakly is a corporate paper and has been for some time, and has corporate interests, and the editorial staff are all a bit long on the tooth, married, with kids and mortgages and so the paper doesn’t really reflect Los Angeles the way Los Ang needs to be portrayed as we quickly approach Armagedon. My new magazine will hopefully feature a pullout, detailed calendar section of events, happenings and the like, but the remaining part of the paper will be devoted to local, national and international views and reportage on politics, film, art, music and culture, done with a fine tuned sense of irreverance. I want to cover both mainstream and whats left of the underground, but from an equal take, and tone, not having an emphasis that something from a major label is more important than a record or literary release that is self-produced. And no pandering to Hollywood stars, their studios and publicity machines-----YUCK YUCK AND DOUBLE YUCK. More on this as it develops.
***
Bricktops Vincent Youmans Tea for Two party was utterly delightful. Miss Venus DeMille, the granddaughter of famed director Cecile B. DeMille sang and tittilated in a very charming way, accompanied on keyboards by handsome Kristian Hoffman and the California Navel Jazz Band were electrifying. DJ Pirate Jenny was playing some scorching tunes, and taxi dancer suprema Miss Mary, Mary in her Valkaries get-up was serving the choreographed sex appeal in spadeulas! The luminaries in the crowd included that hunky, super intellectual and downright gorgeous Mark Simpson, the man responsible for the term "Metrosexual" and author of many amazing tomes. Mark is also a supreme wit and known for busting the apple-cherries of many a young military recruit around the world. He was accompanied by famed journalist Peter McQuaid of the New York Times Magazine, and other internationally known publications. The great goddess Alexis Del Lago made a stately appearance, this royal woman was bejewelled, of course, looking young and radiant. Noted art historian Robert Summers came with photographer Matt Lipps and Argentinian conceptual artist Michael Lucas, they were seen mingling with young intermedia porn artiste and academe Zeb, designer Cory Marie, Don Spiro, Augusta & Penny Starr Jr. Looking lovely and spirited, Madame Xochitl with Madelyn and a zesty Jason El Norte.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 3:22 PM
Friday, June 17, 2005
INDRE OPLOSNING
Had a very sweet lady afternoon tea with lovely Jean Spinosa at her compound in the Russian Quarter. Jean is a San Francisco transplant and Bricktops mainstay. She's also a talented actress and supurb movement artist of the uptmost sensitivity and grace. It was nice having a girlish one-on-one with her, drinking English tea and munching on dainties. Her insightful take on a variety of subjects was very winning.
My dinner date with Alexei of the hot new downtown club, Little Pedro's was filled with frivolity and laughter. Alexei is adorable, cute and very spunky. I'd love to toss his robust garden salad and shrimp his sturdy mantoes silly. He took me to this great sushi bar in "J" town, and i stuffed my concha and drank way too much Sapooros. I was gagging on the lovely extravaganza of Alexei's retelling the story of 80 something year old blues singer Mickey Champion shlogging the 24 year old humpy Mexican drummer of one of the rock bands that plays regularly at Little Pedro's. Now thats the true Los Angeles bohemian spirit at play.
Later in the evening at Little Peds i was hosting a Butt Magazine Party that featured a musical performance by the GoGos trib band The Gay-Gays---i think thats what they're called. I'm not a big fan of tribute bands,it seems like one step up from Kareoke and i HATE Kareoke. The GayGays featured Chris Freeman of Pansy Division and that uber cute boy Bill Yoelin,who use to play in the band Best Revenge, and was a Club Sucker regular with his handsome hustlery older ex-beau who had fathered a child within a previous relationship. Thursday nite at Little Peds is called La Polla Loca and the DJ's are juicy and cuddly Jeppe from the Danish pop band Junior/Senior and pretty Rudy Bleu of Scutter Magazine fame. The crowd really seemed coked up, in fact the bubbly drummer of the GayGays who happens to be the best friend of Eve Harrington's son Echo, the careerist Silverlake boy who use to go to Club Sucker and got into a hen scratching with Gus Van Sant's boyfriend. The drummer came into my makeshift dressing area and took a few toots up his nosetravar before going on stage, which caused their version of "Surfing and Spying" to take on a new element. Whenever i've covered a GoGo's song i've done one of the obscure ones like "London Boys" "He's So Strange" or "Rive Gauche". If i do a popular one like "This Town" i really change it quite a bit and make it almost unrecognizeable, thus making it more my own. Well how's that for my 32 cent critique?
It was great seeing the Mikulan/Rosses from the LA Weekly in the audience, dinge queen delight Marvina Jones, photogs Dino Dinco, Matt Lipps, art historian Robert Summers, Baby Paul who did my make-up and helped style my proto Grace Jones Crackhead look, and Rage. Sean DeLear was telling me about her woes having worked at Odyssey Magazine, the throw-away gay rag.
I even got to chow down on the tight buttstickle of a young handsome latino boy, actually i made him sit plum square on my face. Amazingly i didn't wake up with a hangover.
***
this just in from my famous writer pal who scored a most excellent cover in the LA Weakly, interviewing David La Chappelle about his new documentary "Rize"
Hey Lady,
I'm glad you liked the piece. It was both easy and hard because I had so many great quotes that had to hit the cutting room floor, and so many analytical things were left out due to space constraints as well. But they'll all be in the version of the piece that's in my book...
And, good lord, trying to convince the Weekly to do this piece was like trying to convince Michael Jackson that pre-pubescent white-boy ass ain't nectar of the gods. I pitched it as a cover MONTHS ago and they hemmed and hawed and passed, saying they MIGHT make it a second lead feature. That's what they [ conditionally ] assigned it as, but I turned in such a strong piece [ pats self on back ] that they let me write longer. And when whatever-white-boy-they're-trying-to-turn-into-a-superstar fucked up and left them without a cover, I got a last minute phone call that I needed to flesh out my piece even more because I now had the cover slot. Well, you know, we darkies have to be grateful for whatever crumbs come our way, so I whipped out the sagging black tit and milked it for more, and voila! A cover story!
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 12:10 PM
Wednesday, June 15, 2005
HOLLYWOOD BRA
Last night Andrew of Gould hosted an inviting dinner party at his Laughlin Park Estate in honor of Franko B and his lover Kristofer Canavan. The lovely little party included Ron Athey, Professor Jennifer Doyle and Ron's handsome Swiss realness boyfriend Maxmillian. The vegan meal was supurb and the desert exquisite. The conversation was rabid and exciting with topics ranging from Miss Michael Jackson to America's feudal prison system.
I've received a lot of emails from news outlets wanting me to comment on the MJ verdicts. I've turned them all down. What i will say is that i remember her coming regularly to Retail Slut on Melrose Avenue in the early 80s when i worked as a shop girl there. She would have a few body guards with her, and seemed a little plucked that no one really paid that much attention to her. I was pleasant but didn't fawn. I wasn't making commission just barely above minmimum wage, so i couldn't care less if she bought anything or not. Fertile La Toyah Jackson was the house designer at the store , and la Jackson did regularly purchase Fertile's unique designs, and asked when she'd make something new. Cher also loved what Fertile made, and stopped by regularly. Fertile's best designers were always the costumes she made for our group The Afro Sisters. Well anyway, Missy MJ didn't use that fake soft spoken voice that everyone associates with her now. Her real intonation is actually quite masculine. One thing i do remember from those days is when a good looking young latino, mulato or surfer boy came into the store her eyeballs got all thyroidy and twitchy.
***
This missive from an internationally known media critic pal of mine:
Just got the following message from a producer friend who lives in NY and has seen some episodes of TV's latest celebrity reality show----
What is below the bottom of the barrel?
The disease of celeb-reality TV is mutating into ever more toxic strains. Here are some of the latest
Being Bobby Brown, starts end of June. The couple's drugged-up ghetto lifestyle in full glare. One episode has Bobby describing how he helped his wife with her constipation, by inserting his fingers to massage it out. Whitney says, "When I told my girlfriends about it, they said 'That's real love, baby. That's real black love.'" Bobby then holds up four fingers and wiggles them in front of the camera.
***
And this from the divine Annie Sprinkle:
PLEASE DO FORWARD AND POST THIS NOTE!
Dear Friends and Family,
I’m about to drive to LA for four fun packed fabulous days of
activities. Just wanted you to know what’s up. I’m particularly
excited about the show I’m doing with Beth on Saturday night at
Highways. It’s the story of how we met, fell in love, and all the
projects we’ve been doing together about love. I think you’d enjoy it.
Other great love artists are performing too.
Would love to see you at something or other. I miss you!
Love and cuddles,
Annie
Contents:
Wednessday—Hustler Hollywood book event.
Thursday—Learning Annex LA
Friday—Highways Performance Space—An evening about orgasm.
Saturday—Highways Performance Space—An evening about love art.
Monday—The VIEW, with Barbara Walters.
WEDNESDAY, JUNE 15.
HUSTLER HOLLYWOOD
Annie will present her new book, Dr. Sprinkle’s Spectacular Sex—Make
Over Your Love Life. She’ll do some readings, and put tit prints in
each book sold.(Just before going to the bookstore, I’ll be on Playboy radio, live at 4:00.)
THURSDAY, JUNE 16.
LEARNING ANNEX CLASS—LOS ANGELES
Everyone is welcome. http://www.learningannex.com/default.taf?newcity=LA
SPECTACULAR SEX! --MAKE OVER YOUR LOVE LIFE
In this enlightening, and spectacularly fun "make over" program, Annie
will help you take charge of your sex life and gain the confidence to
explore ways for using your sexuality to create more love in your life.
You will learn:*what “spectacular sex” really is. *to create a
custom-made sex-pot profile and a fabulous alter ego to help you become
the sex pot you want to be. *to utilize your sexuality to create more
love in your life. *tips how to make sex more meaningful and
delightful.
FRIDAY, JUNE 17.
HIGHWAYS PERFORMANCE SPACE, SANTA MONICA (highwaysperformance.org)
THE ART OF CAPTURING THE ORGASM
Presentation: 8:30 until 10:30 Discussion 10:30 until 11:00
Grab your popcorn! Three film-makers show-and-tell about their
experiences exploring the human orgasm on film.
Veronica Hart, former adult film star and producer/director of hundreds
of sexually oriented films will deconstruct the filming of the male
“cum shot” vs. the female orgasm, and examine the trends in popular
culture. Former priest and sex therapist/researcher, Dr. Michael
Perry, filmed women having orgasms from the inside out. Annie Sprinkle,
Ph.D. will present some of her new documentary film, Amazing World of
Orgasm and other clips. Then there will be a discussion with the
audience.
Sexually explicit. Over 18 years old adults only.
(I’ll be on the Larry Mantle radio program this morning, at 11:15. NPR
station.)
Saturday, June 18.
HIGHWAYS PERFORMANCE SPACE, SANTA MONICA
A EVENING OF LOVE AS ART
(highwaysperformance.org)
Presentation: 8:30 until 10:30. 11:15 til 12:15—Love Art Sessions
Five artists show-and-tell about their lives and their work exploring
love as art. Angela Ellsworth and Tania Katan present Long Distance,
and invite you to join them in exploring the distance between two
points. Kathe Izzo, founder of the True Love Project will read from her
memoir, LOVE ARTIST and perform some of her True Love Day with the
audience. Sprinkle and Elizabeth Stephens, will present projects from
their Love Art Laboratory, including their Sperm Dance Off and Cuddle
piece.
After the presentation there will be a discussion. Then some Love Art
sessions with the artists will be raffled off to the audience. Annie
and Beth will be offering CUDDLE sessions.
MONDAY, JUNE 19TH.
If all goes according to plan, I’ll be on nation TV show, the VIEW,
with Barbara Walters, in NYC. Tune in!
There are more details about these events on my web site,
anniesprinkle.org.
Go to calender.
***
This from Bruce "Judy" LaBruce, who i haven't heard from in a long time.
oh miss davis: you’re too jet setterish for me. i never get to see you. but luckily, my opening at peres projects is on july 16th and so i will be coming to LA on july 10th so we’ll have plenty of time for ketchup. plus you must know that everyone who is anyone in the gay scenerena in berlin uses gayromeo.com to get laid. go there and register now and you can set up some prearranged joustings. it looks like i may be shooting bangers in sept.... x blab p.s. i will have to tell you about my latest affaire d’amour de fou... i’m being plough-shared by a hot black cuban salsa instructor who also happens to be a babalu, a santeria priest of sorts. in other words, he reads sea shells and kills chickens in order to ward off evil spirits and the like. finally i will be able to rid myself of that old black magic being launched at me by those dainty satanists like stupid bad rick(Castro) and stupid bad kenneth angry.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 6:21 PM
Tuesday, June 14, 2005
THE RENDEVOUS COURT
At the historic Biltmore Hotel in downtown Los Ang, is where i hosted an elegant high tea party Sunday afternoon. Coordinating the soiree was beautiful and talented designer and costume goddess Mary E. Pagone. Mary lives in a gorgeous garden flat at the Park LaBrea housing compound. It was nice spending quality time with Miss Mary, Cory Marie and Melissa "Sexchester" Nerell drinking mamosas before heading downtown to the Bilt.
It was divine getting the opportunity to socialize with the Moveable Feast Collective members that include: Miss Mary, Cory, Melissa, Sasha Fuentes, Jean Spinosa, Andre, Christiane & their sweet bundle of perfection Calliope Rose, the Bricktops baby. Also joining in the fellowship and frivolity, the amazing Abby Travis & her handsome beau Randall, juicy Whirly Girl Xochitl and her sexy doctor girlfriend Marissa. Xochitl and Marissa rode their bikes all the way from Los Feliz to Pershing Square and were glowing deliciously. Famed writer Lisa Teasley came by looking like a vision, and i also got to read her wonderous essay in the LA Times Magazine about modern Dads. The rest of the tea-toddlers included art historian Robert Summers, Anderson Cooper with his new lover Peter, Mr. Tin Pan Alley himself, Richard Halperin and blonde boy sweathearts Aaron and Adam.
After tea everyone decided to explore all the various ballrooms of the Biltmore and we ran into a couple of ghosts including the restless spirit of Elizabeth Short aka: The Black Dahlia. Perhaps this will become a regular summer social event.
Got word from a reliable source that Maverick Records honcho Guy Oseary was at Bricktops Friday with Foo Fighters drummer Taylor Hawkins. Now i don't particularly care one way or the other for Guy Oseary, i just hope Madonna, aka: McDonna never steps foot at Bricktops, or that will be the clubs doom McDonna equals sudden death. A simple rule for kids to follow.
Yesterday i met Lady Bunny at the Mal Maison Softel, that icky hotel across the street from the Beverly Center. Lady Bun Bun is in town because of Gay Pride where she performed Sunday. Lady B has finally made the transformation from drag queen to biological female, and without the help of hormone therapy or a plastic surgeon. Wow! breastage just developed naturally, her penis fell off and she grew an instant designer vagigner.
.: posted by Vaginal Davis 5:34 PM
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